Strategies to Ease Anxiety for the New School Year

Are you a worrier?

Do new situations keep you up at night as your brain ponders every possible thing that could happen? 

Do you get the feeling of a pit in the bottom of your stomach when you think about doing something for the first time?

Do your palms get sweaty?  Do you cry? Get angry? Restless? Increased heart rate? Trouble concentrating?  Feeling weak or tired?

All of those are symptoms of anxiety. 

If we feel and experience all of those symptoms as an adult, think about how kids might feel. 

As we approach the upcoming school year, there WILL be kids that are experiencing anxiety.  I know--I have one of them.

The week leading up to kindergarten was rough.  My son cried EVERY morning. He got angry at night. He just wasn't himself.  

So, what can we do to help ease the anxiety and fears of  our students?  The ideas listed below are from personal experience.  Keep in mind I am not a licensed counselor, but they did help my child!

1. Communicate with the teacher

One of the first steps should always be communicating with your child's teacher.  It is highly likely they have experienced similar situations with students in the past, and will be able to provide some strategies to help you and your child get through the first of the year. 

Providing your child's teacher with extra insight will also help the teacher approach your child and the situation differently.  The more teachers know about their students....the better! 

2. Take a picture

Let you child take a picture of the family to school.  Of course it is always a good idea to check with the teacher and see if this is okay.  My son's teacher lets him keep an image in his desk, and he can pull it out when he is feeling sad or worried. 

3. Validate feelings 

When you validate your child's emotions, you can help your child feel seen, understood and valued. This helps your child identify their emotions and how to work through them.  

Say things like:

• I can see that you are (worried, upset, sad, frightened, scared.)
• I can see that going to school is hard for you.
• Yes, I can see how going to school might make you feel (worried, upset, sad, scared.)
• It makes sense that you would be (scared, upset, worried, etc.) about going to school.
• I can see you are feeling overwhelmed.  Let me help you with that.  Can we chat? 
• Your suffering is my suffering (because I love you).

4. Model how to deal with emotions in a healthy way

Kids learn how to manage their emotions by repeating strategies they see the adults in their life use. To raise an emotionally healthy child, adults must model how to deal with emotions in a healthy way.  

If you are feeling a certain way, let your child know and then explain what you are going to do about it.

"I am feeling so sad about you going to school because I won't be able to be with you all day. Mommy is going to carry a picture of you in her pocket and pull it out when she is feeling sad and think about all the fun we will have when we get back together!"

Naming the emotion and modeling a healthy outlet is a wonderful teaching tool for your child to see. 

5. Read books 

Check out the list of books you can read with your child to ease those first day jitters! 

My personal favorite is the kissing hand because it gives you and your child a strategy.  Kiss you child's hand before they depart from you and when they feel sad, they can smoosh their little palm on their face and feel your love. 

6. Create a social story

A social story is a simple story that describes a social story or upcoming situation  and the appropriate way to act in that situation.  This walks your anxious child through their routine, and what they can expect for their day.  It eases their brain and makes their day predictable. 

Check out some already made social stories by visiting Autism Little Learners.  She has a wonderful library of free social stories for school!

If you are looking for more tips on how to ease anxiety in your students or your child, visit the Child Mind Institute  or Understood.  Both of those websites have wonderful resources and tips!

Top Books to Ease First Day of School Anxiety

Going back to school, or starting school for the very first time is a momentous occasion in every child's life.  

Some kids are bursting with excitement and can hardly wait for the first day back.

Others have lots of back to school butterflies fluttering around in their bellies as they dread the start of school.    

My son is one of the anxious ones.  He will start kindergarten this week, and is very worried! I get it!!  There are so many new things for him to experience.  He will see new spaces and new faces.  He will meet new friends and start new routines. SO. MUCH. CHANGE!  

As a parent, I wanted to ease his first day jitters ahead of time by reading books to help prepare him for his first day. 

Books are truly an amazing way to reassure kids when new situations have them scared.  Authors do a fantastic job putting emotions into words and having relatable characters.

 

Below are six fantastic books to help calm the nerves as students return to school.

Worrysauraus by Rachel Bright (PreK-2)

Perfect for any reader who might feel the flutter of an anxious butterfly in their tummy.  The Worrysaurus has a wonderful day planned, but it isn't long before a small butterfly of worry starts fluttering his his tummy.  What is he to do?   With a little help from his mom, the worrysaurus finds a way to soothe the anxious butterflies. 

The Kissing Hand by Audrey Penn  (PreK-2)

First published in 1993, this heartwarming book has touched the lives of millions of children as they struggle with separation.  School is starting for Chester Raccoon, and he doesn't want to go.  To help ease his fears, Mrs. Racoon shares a family secret called the Kissing Hand to give Chester the reassurance of love at any time. 

Wemberly Worried by Kevein Henkes (PreK-2)

This book is a warm and comforting back to school book favored by many.  Wemberly worries about everything.  Big things. Little things. And things in between. Then it is time for school to start, and Wemberly is worried even more. Wemberly gets to school and realizes that school is too much fun to waste time worrying!

Sad, Sad Bear by Kimberly Gee (PreK-K)

Young readers can relate to bear as he experiences going to school or daycare for the very first time.  Bear feels very, very sad as he is in cub care and mommy is at work.  Luckily, with the help of some brand new friends, Bear is able to cheer up.  

Invisible String by Patrice Karst (Grades 2-4)

This book offers a simple approach to overcoming loneliness, separation or loss that is easy for children to understand and welcome.  In this reassuring story, a mother comforts her two children who are frightened.  She explains that even when she isn't with them, that they are all connected with an invisible string. 

Llama Llama Misses Mama by Anna Dewdney  (Prek-1)

Little faces can connect with Little Llama as he experiences separation anxiety on his first day of school.  Little llama has a strange new teacher, strange new toys and there is lots of kids and lots of noise.  Little llama doesn't know what to do, and he feels so new! 

For more back to school book suggestions check out this list from Today or Scholastic.